Chuck Norris

nosaj · Post by **nosaj** » Sat Apr 19, 2008 8:12 pm

There is no such thing as a hurricane...it is just Chuck Norris farting.

Post by **mosespa** » Sun Apr 20, 2008 8:10 am

To nosaj:

Is the person behind your name the same person who is behind the name "madjedi" and/or any/all of the aliases?

Just curious...you don't HAVE to take it personally...

...unless, of course, I'm right...loeffingl

bpmolder · Post by **bpmolder** » Mon Apr 21, 2008 6:03 am

I challenged Chuck Norris to a fight once. True story, honest.

Here is some of the background:

I was about 4 years old and with my folks out somewhere that he was at. My mother was a huge fan of his so she decided to ask him for his autograph. When she approached him, he pushed her out of the way, physically pushed her, and told her to fuck off. I was too young to know what was happening but my father told me about it and how he was jumped by a few of Chuck's bodyguards when he tried to defend her honor.

When I was 17, I was training at a Hapkido school in Los Angeles and he came in to see my Sensei who knew him somehow. When I saw him, I called him on what he did and he just tried to brush me off with his ego. I tried everything I could to get him to fight but he wouldn't, for one reason or another. Some say that it was because he didn't want to kick my ass but I don't think I would have been that easy of a win as mad as I was.

Fuck Chuck Norris.

David Smith · Post by **David Smith** » Mon Apr 21, 2008 10:00 pm

Well Norris is an utter hasbeen now with a back catelogue of by and large shit productions, so would love to see him treating a fan like that now

PublicImage · Post by **PublicImage** » Mon Apr 21, 2008 10:08 pm

You have an avatar! OMG!!1

Haha. I really need to watch some David Lynch films.

David Smith · Post by **David Smith** » Mon Apr 21, 2008 10:26 pm

PublicImage wrote:You have an avatar! OMG!!1

Yup, courtesy of Bran so a big thank you to him for making my posts look more interesting now. Means you all get a lovely picture of Lynch at the side

PublicImage wrote:Haha. I really need to watch some David Lynch films.

Make sure you do. Mullholland Drive is my favourite film of all time, couldn't recommend it enough even if i do frequently find myself explaining the plot to people. Beautiful from start to end. Lost Highway is also a classic, and really quite haunting. Probably next in line would be INLAND EMPIRE for me, although most people would probably recommend Blue Velvet which is spectacular, even if just for its use of Roy Orbison music. Both The Elephant Man and The Straight Story are quite interesting actually in showing how the guy can make family friendly films too.

Oh! and Eraserhead is classy too. Ending is really quite disturbing, and there are a lot of strong images

Actually all his films are worth seeing aside from Dune which is quite grating. Wasn't huge on Wild at Heart either, but got a feeling it may grow on me like Fire Walk With Me did

Post by **mosespa** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 12:44 am

I like Dune, myself. *shrug*

I even like the extended cut that he had his name removed from...gawd, what does THAT say about me?

Hudini · Post by **Hudini** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 1:31 am

Does that say you like the work of Frederic Paul and hate the one by David Lynch?

David Smith · Post by **David Smith** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 10:09 am

mosespa wrote:I like Dune, myself. *shrug*

I found it quite interesting that he turned down Return of the Jedi to make it

Under him Jedi certainly would have been a very different film

Oh, and to go back to topic; David Lynch would never cast Chuck Norris in his films. He's simply not an actor of a high enough caliber for any of Lynch's emotionally intense roles

Damn!t · Post by **Damn!t** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 10:22 am

Type "find Chuck Norris" in Google and click "I'm feeling lucky"
...

David Smith · Post by **David Smith** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 10:26 am

Damn!t wrote:Type "find Chuck Norris" in Google and click "I'm feeling lucky"
...

Good stuff

The only problem with Churck Norris jokes are that Chuck endorses them. After he went on Letterman or Tonight, or whatever show it was, and started talking about them i began to find the whole thing far less funny

2066 · Post by **2066** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 2:04 pm

Chuck Norris is hung like a horse so while he's beating off to a picture of himself he hangs a horse with his other hand.

Hudini · Post by **Hudini** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 2:06 pm

David Smith wrote:David Lynch would never cast Chuck Norris in his films. He's simply not an actor of a high enough caliber for any of Lynch's emotionally intense roles

Chuck Norris is simply not an actor.

David Smith · Post by **David Smith** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 2:11 pm

Hudini wrote:
David Smith wrote:David Lynch would never cast Chuck Norris in his films. He's simply not an actor of a high enough caliber for any of Lynch's emotionally intense roles
Chuck Norris is simply not an actor.

True, his job is just to stand about looking strong, and that's about it

He's an actor from the same school as Mr T

nosaj · Post by **nosaj** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 7:57 pm

mosespa wrote:To nosaj:

1. Is the person behind your name the same person who is behind the name "madjedi" and/or any/all of the aliases?

2. Just curious...you don't HAVE to take it personally...

3. ...unless, of course, I'm right...loeffingl

1. What made you think that?

2. I don't take much personally.

3. I thought you were always right?

Is this the beginning of a nosification?

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